Tuesday: What a wondrous day! I woke filled with an energy of excitement and felt ready to take on the world. Changes are coming and I am looking forward to it all. There are still people who will need to be told, and I will get to it soon. I think they will believe me even more crazy than they already do, but some will shrug it off as "just the way she is". Others will not be so kind, but they do not matter.
When I talked with my Dad about the change I was making, he was a lot more understanding than I thought he would be. I'm so grateful for that!
Thursday: The weather is too nice to remain indoors and I have been walking in the mornings. My body is still protesting the use of different muscles (from biking), but I'm feeling even more alive. There is a grand beauty in the world sometimes.
Days like today are what I will remember when I have grown old.
Friday: A day to celebrate! And to share with loved ones. Sales are doing well and I'm going to be able to expand my lines a bit. With the way things are going, I will now be able to carry more yarn kits along with the regular updates! That is a really great thing.
On the downside (but not really), we're still muddling through the taxes. My preparer is Rachel and she's so patient and helpful! Last year I just lumped everything together, since I didn't really know better, but she's showing me how to separate everything out into different sections. I'm learning that I will need to completely revamp my spreadsheet, but I'm fine with that. Especially since it will make things a lot easier next year.
My fingers are crossed that I don't owe anything (I didn't make quarterly payments during 2011.)
Monday: The weekend was fabulous! I got to spend it with Kevin and Demetrius, playing with blocks, watching a movie, and looking at trains. I've mixed feelings about being called "Grandma". Part of me feels honored that his parents are teaching Demetrius to call me that, while another part of me feels that it's just not possible. After all, I'm only forty and still feel so alive. After listening to the two of them (Kevin & Demetrius) playing in the early morning, I had this thought: I will be the coolest and most vibrant grandmother I can be. To any and all children who call me Ama (the name I am claiming as a unique and awesome grandmother).
I had a long letter from a friend over the weekend and, when I sat down to read the whole thing without distraction, I was touched by all the love she was sending to me through it. There are still things that I am hurting over, and things I need to make decisions about, but I feel more calm and at peace with myself. I am going to take more time for just thinking and not filling my day with noise and clatter. I need the calm. As much as I need to know that the support is there.
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